I can't even begin to express my gratitude for the letters, books, lotions, cards, candies, gas and grocery gift cards, baby outfits, cozy socks for me, and donations that people have sent.and I often
blessing/prayer tree |
I need those reminders for this emotional roller coaster I am on. Last night I cried for my husband and how he has been thrust into a single parent position, still having to run his business and worry about his wife and four unborn children, who are far away. And of course these past two weeks, our boys have been passing back and forth the stomach virus and strep throat! Causing him to have to stay home from work. His partners have been very supportive, but my sweet husband truly cares about his company, the people who work there, and the customers that he works with. He knows they all "understand" but he still doesn't want to let anyone down. I can relate, because I feel the same way over my company, and I don't know what I would do without my amazing team. At the salon on Tuesday we had a Redken educator in teaching the staff about the new lines coming out, the educator later emailed me about how impressed she was at the teamwork and leadership my staff exemplified, and how truly lovely they all are! What a compliment! I am always thankful when our guests compliment our stylist on how much they love their new hair cut or color, but when people compliment their character...it warms my heart!
Subject #2 I thought I would take the time to answer some of the questions that are most frequently asked. Some might sound silly, but I kid you not, all questions that I am including have been asked at least 5 separate times!
~quick side bar~
I always thought FAQ's stood for facts, until one day at work I was navigating a website with my right hand, Shari and we were trying to find out the answer to a question we had. She told me to check the frequently asked questions tab. I said that would be so helpful, but I don't see it. She was standing behind me and said it's there in the upper right hand corner. To which I replied "all I see is Contact Us, Home, and the "Facts"" She laughed and explained what the FAQ's stood for!
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FAQ's:
1) Do quads run in your family? No! I am not a geneticist, but I am fairly sure that quads don't run in any family! I have answered a few times that "well, my mom's mom was a twin and my dad is a twin..." and then they respond "oh, that explains it." I just smile!
2) When I say "quads" I get: "no way!!! three babies??!!" to which I respond "actually there are four in there!" ;)
3) Are they identical? Nope, all fraternal! that means four separate eggs were fertilized, no eggs split! This means that they will not look exactly alike, they will look like brothers and sister, not the same.
4) Did you do IVF? Nope! I have PCOS(poly cystic ovarian syndrome), I suffered a miscarriage in January of 2013, and after not being able to get pregnant and having extremely long and heavy periods, my doctor suggested trying a round of Clomid(helps to produce healthy eggs) and IUI(inner uterine insemination). No fertilized eggs were placed in my uterus. My husbands sperm was placed closer to my cervix, IUI is simply a head start!
5) Can you tell which baby is which? yes...sometimes! they form a cross, baby A lays butt down on my cervix, so if I feel movement down low, I know it's him. Baby B(our girl) lays with her head to the right of my belly button. Baby D lays back to back with Baby B and across the top of my belly. Baby C occupies the whole left side, he is head down and his feet come up to meet baby D. They all have parts that meet around my belly button, so movement in that area is hard to distinguish; however, if movement is on one of the outskirts of the cross, I know which baby it is!
6) Are you having a natural vaginal birth? NNNNNOOOOOOOO!! that sounds horrifying! there are several reasons why not: 1)all four babies would have to be head down.
2) I have had two previous c-sections and to try and have a vaginal birth after that is dangerous.
3) just the thought makes me cross my legs!
4) there are many complications that can occur with delivering grand multiples and a c-section is the fastest, safest way to get the babies out.
7) Will you get to have the babies each lay on your chest before they are taken to the NICU? sadly, NO. If they are stable enough, they will be wheeled by me, in their isolates, long enough for me to see them. They will then be wheeled into the hall for my boys to be able to see and family to get a few pictures before they are taken to the NICU. I pray the babies will be stable enough, because this will be the only time Campbell and Jack will be able to see their siblings until the babies come home :(
8) Do you want to have more children? NOPE!!!!! I have asked for my tubes to be tied, burned, removed...whatever it takes!
9) How long will the babies be in the NICU? Typically, preemies are released around their 40 week due date(where they are full term), that is May 22nd.
10) How are you going to handle four? That is a great question! and Matt and I still don't have a great answer! We will do our best! we will have good days and we will have really hard days, but we will do our best! I don't think it is possible to be prepared to double a family of four. It is overwhelming to think about the logistics of it all, the time, schedules, finances! We will struggle, we are not under the illusion that this will be easy, but when we were asked to reduce, to eliminate the lives of two or three of our babies, we said no! We trusted God to provide then, and we are going to trust Him to provide now!
Hi! im been following you for weeks now and i want to say congrats that you have made it this long!! I have 1 year old b/g twins:) I was wondering about how do you know your eggs didnt split? From what i read online about fraternal and identical was that even though each baby has its own placenta and inside its own sac there is still a chance that they could be identical in your case 2 or all 3 boys could have come from one egg that split early in conception making each one have its own placenta and sac. Only way to truly find out is by doing a DNA test after birth. My twins are clomid babies too:) congrats!
ReplyDeleteHey Lilian, true, but so very rare! I only know what the doctors tell me. It sure would be interesting to see once they are here if two seem to be id's. I don't think I would ever do testing to find out for sure...it is neither here nor there for me, as long as they are happy and healthy!
DeleteHi Julianne,
DeleteI just read your whole blog! Having used to live in Watkinsville, and a MOM, I was intrigued! Your whole "overflow" stay was all too familiar! I couldn't get stable and was in that horrid bed for a week! There was also construction going on. The staff said I was their longest resident in L&D and gave me a sweet gift card for my babies!
I wanted to comment, also, because I was Clomid & IUI also, and like you didn't have the number of eggs per the number of babies conceived. There was much conversation and debate over if mine were identical or fraternal. With the egg situation, separate sacs, but fused placenta… after they were born they tested them. Turns out they were 60/40 so most likely one egg split and then was fertilized by two swimmers. Through talking about it with many other multiple moms, the consensus was that since the shot given to ovulate and the IUI delivering the swimmers to the door so to speak, was more common in IUI situations. Anyway, my boys are now 15 and look just alike if you take their hair away except for the fact one is 6'4" and one is 6'!! One has brown curly hair and the other is blond. I often wonder what the other baby we lost would have looked like!
Anyway, I was on bed rest for 17 weeks! You can do this!!!!
Sara
Thank you for sharing your journey with us! I'm a NICU social worker and mama after infertility and loss myself so I'm eager to follow along.
ReplyDeleteHi Julianne! You don't know me, but my name is Jessica Tanner. Your story on WSBTV was next to mine yesterday online! I did the widow story and pics My full time job is a newborn photographer, and while I have photographed two sets of triplets, I have never had the chance to do quads! If you don't have a newborn photographer yet, I would love to gift you a session!!! If you are interested, please visit my website or FB page! www.jessicatannerphotography.com or www.facebook.com/jessicatannerphotography and send me an email or message me!!
ReplyDeleteI would love to meet you and all FOUR of your new babies!!